Consuming thoughts

Bobbing up and down with a squeal , a smile so beautiful it lifts the weight from my shoulders, splashing and stomping on the warm waters edge, laughing as the Spray soaks his skin . Watching my 10 year old son like this fills me with pure joy, a moment in time where he’s light…

Special needs parents are not saints.

Special needs parents are not saints. I know there’s some kind of saintly image that us parents of children with additional needs are supposed to uphold. ..but we are just people, nothing more. . ” I don’t know how you do it ” well you know what? Neither do I! We still shout on occasions,…

I am an autism mum, but what does that mean? !

I am an autism mum! But what does that mean? Firstly it means that I’m a mother, I was a mother as soon as I saw that positive pregnancy test, and I’m still that mother now. (Well I may have changed a little ) Secondly it means. ……actually let’s be honest! It can mean almost…

Why is it so hard to admit I’m burnt out? !

Why is it so hard to admit I’m burnt out? Why is it so hard to admit I’m at breaking point? I smile and chat to people, I manage to capture happy moments in a photo, but these moments are becoming fewer. I share people’s joy and feel pleased for them. But inside is a…

School holiday jealousy

I’m jealous! ! There i said It. ..I’m jealous! ‘But jealous of what ‘ I hear you ask Well quite a lot probably if I’m honest, flat tums, sunny holidays, full nights sleep, yes I could write quite a long list haha, but the jealousy I feel right now is of the parents that look…

This isn’t just tiredness

My eyes sting with tiredness as I open them, I rub them trying to clear the blur. I’m tired. I’m always tired, I can’t remember when I wasn’t. I think back to when my 1st child was a newborn, and I felt overwhelmed with tiredness from the sleepless nights. Well little did I know that…

My shining star

My shining star That time of year is here again with Mothers creating costumes from bed sheets and card. Children practicing lines . Parents shuffling to take a seat as tinsel is placed on angels hair . Fairy lights twinkling on a Christmas tree and carols fill the air . My son’s special school is…

Fireworks night is too much bang .

Fireworks night is too much bang! I have very fond memories of fireworks night as a child. We would dress up in far too many layers and stand at the top of the garden huddled with mum, while dad lit the fireworks at the end of the garden. All eyes to the sky looking at…

The right to pee.

The right to pee !! A modern day horror story. Right we’re going out as a family, what are the thing’s we need to consider! ? Food everyone will like? Who’s driving? Money? Suitable for all ages? Maybe packing a changing bag? What about the toilet facilities? ? Surely if you’re out and you need…

Halloween magic

Halloween magic. This is a beautiful time of year. The colours red, brown, orange, yellow. So fresh and rustic. The evenings getting darker with a nip in the air and a faint smell of fire. And with this time of year comes the spooky magic of Halloween. Here in England the magic of Halloween is…

When my son cuddles another woman.

When my son cuddles another woman. That time I sat 5 rows back at the school performance then my son caught my eye, there he was near the front while his school friends danced and clapped on stage. I saw my son sitting close to a class TA, touching her face just like he does…

This is me

This is me Walking free Free as I can be Autism is with me Not a friend But not an enemy It’s just part of me The sun is warm on my face and neck It’s bright for my eyes I look to the ground and watch my feet move The repetitive rhythm finds me…